Parallel Thoughts

One day while walk­ing down the street a highly suc­cess­ful Human Resources Man­ager was trag­i­cally hit by a bus and she died. Her soul arrived up in heaven where she was met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself.

“Wel­come to Heaven,” said St. Peter. “Before you get set­tled in though, it seems we have a prob­lem. You see, strangely enough, we’ve never once had a Human Resources Man­ager make it this far and we’re not really sure what to do with you.”

“No prob­lem, just let me in,” said the woman.

“Well, I’d like to, but I have higher orders. What we’re going to do is let you have a day in Hell and a day in Heaven and then you can choose whichever one you want to spend an eter­nity in.”

“Actu­ally, I think I’ve made up my mind, I pre­fer to stay in Heaven”, said the woman

“Sorry, we have rules…”

And with that St. Peter put the exec­u­tive in an ele­va­tor and it went down-down-down to hell.

The doors opened and she found her­self step­ping out onto the putting green of a beau­ti­ful golf course. In the dis­tance was a coun­try club and stand­ing in front of her were all her friends – fel­low exec­u­tives that she had worked with and they were well dressed in evening gowns and cheer­ing for her. They ran up and kissed her on both cheeks and they talked about old times. They played an excel­lent round of golf and at night went to the coun­try club where she enjoyed an excel­lent steak and lob­ster dinner.

She met the Devil who was actu­ally a really nice guy (kind of cute) and she had a great time telling jokes and danc­ing. She was hav­ing such a good time that before she knew it, it was time to leave. Every­body shook her hand and waved good­bye as she got on the elevator.

The ele­va­tor went up-up-up and opened back up at the Pearly Gates and found St. Peter wait­ing for her.

“Now it’s time to spend a day in heaven,” he said. So she spent the next 24 hours loung­ing around on clouds and play­ing the harp and singing. She had great time and before she knew it her 24 hours were up and St. Peter came and got her.

“So, you’ve spent a day in hell and you’ve spent a day in heaven. Now you must choose your eternity,”

The woman paused for a sec­ond and then replied, “Well, I never thought I’d say this, I mean, Heaven has been really great and all, but I think I had a bet­ter time in Hell.”

So St. Peter escorted her to the ele­va­tor and again she went down-down-down back to Hell.

When the doors of the ele­va­tor opened she found her­self stand­ing in a des­o­late waste­land cov­ered in garbage and filth. She saw her friends were dressed in rags and were pick­ing up the garbage and putting it in sacks.

The Devil came up to her and put his arm around her.

“I don’t under­stand,” stam­mered the woman, “yes­ter­day I was here and there was a golf course and a coun­try club and we ate lob­ster and we danced and had a great time. Now all there is a waste­land of garbage and all my friends look miserable.”

The Devil looked at her smiled and said … … … …. …. …. …. …. “Yes­ter­day we were recruit­ing you, today you’re an Employee”

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